Mary or Martha?

Introduction

Have siblings, or it was with your parents, or a spouse or a co-worker or a friend. And particularly if you have ever counseled somebody in some sort of relationship, whether it be a sibling, parent, or friend, you know that there are always at least three sides to every story. There’s the side of the first person who talked, there’s the side of the second person who talked, and there right in the sweet spot is the truth that nobody wants to admit. When it comes to that truth, though, we all know it’s true, unless what happens? Unless we’re person number one or two. Then our side is true. Amen? Some smart men did not amend that. When you think about Luke chapter 10 and verse 38, you have a story of Mary and Martha.

Two different perspectives, two different actions, but unlike us in a world where we are confined to other humans helping us understand our problems, they had the Son of God there. Jesus was in the home there with Martha and Mary. And they have an issue, and Jesus is there to explain the issue. Of course, this morning we’re going to examine the question of are we, am I more like Mary or more like Martha? As Jesus teaches a strong lesson in priorities. In Luke chapter 10, beginning with me in verse 38. Now, as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village, and a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching.

But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me. The Lord answered her, Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her. Of course, in the context of Luke chapter 10, the previous story being written about is Jesus telling the story of the good Samaritan. Of course, there was the lawyer who was seeking to justify himself, trying to figure out what exactly it was he had to do. And part of what Jesus was doing with the parable of the Good Samaritan was defining what is being a good neighbor, what is showing love.

1. They Were Both Doing Some Good Things

And here you fast forward into verses 38 through 42, and you see Mary and Martha, and the first thing you see is they were both doing some good things. Look back at verse 38 and 39. As Jesus is in their home, they’re showing, you might say, hospitality. They’re at least entertaining Jesus in this way. Mary is sitting at his feet listening to his good words. Of course, that phrasing in verse 38 and 39 carries kind of a dual meaning. She literally may have been seated at his feet. But also there is this teacher and pupil type of dynamic that’s listed throughout that phrase there, at least in the original Greek phrase. But then you have Martha who’s doing what? She’s busy with taking care of the group, taking care of Jesus.

She was, as the text says, distracted with much serving. Note, though, that when Martha presses Jesus on this issue in verse 40, she says, Lord, do you not care? Do you not see? Do you not have any strong feeling towards the fact that my sister has left me alone? I’m doing all the hard work. Tell her to help me. Martha’s side was one that said, I’m doing good. I’m doing what we should be doing. I’m showing hospitality, I’m showing love, I’m showing servitude. Tell Mary to help me. But Jesus did not condemn Mary. In fact, I’d also add, Jesus did not condemn Martha for her hospitality. He did not say you were doing something wrong, you were doing something sinful, but rather he is teaching a lesson in priorities.

Note carefully his response in verse 41. As Martha, by the way, not Jesus, has pressed the issue. Note the response and the wisdom of the Son of God. Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things. Stop right there. He says, this issue goes beyond this one thing. This isn’t just Mary not serving with you. You are anxious and troubled about many things. It’s hard to be right when the Son of God knows all and you’re speaking with him as a mediator. Verse 42, but one thing is necessary. Mary’s choice was the best. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her. If I were to say we need to have a priority check, we need to examine how do we spend our time to use the words of Paul in Ephesians chapter 5.

How do we redeem the time? Could we be better? I think we’d all agree, yes, I could be better. Yes, I must be better. But when we examine the Word of God and especially the teachings of Jesus, we’ll see that He is constantly and consistently stressing not only the need to be a complete disciple of His and self-sacrificing in so doing, but that it will take constant putting Jesus first, which we have no problem with, but not putting other things in his way instead, which is a little bit more difficult. Conceptually, it’s easy to say we need to put Jesus first. Practically, it’s very difficult because what was Martha doing? You might very literally be able to say, Martha was literally in the act of serving Jesus.

When he looks at her and says, Martha, you are troubled and anxious about many things. Mary has chosen the good thing. She submitted to that one necessary thing, the thing which will not be taken away from her. Mary was listening to the words of life. She was making time for that which is everlasting, that which truly matters. It’s a difficult truth to look at Martha and say, There’s someone serving Jesus who wasn’t given a pat on the back, but rather a challenge. And now when I look at my life, I have to examine not just am I serving Jesus, not just am I putting God first, but is he truly first in my life? Am I taking in his words? Am I changing my life in accordance with his will, or am I doing what I think is best and saying that that should count for Jesus instead?

2. Excuses at the Great Banquet

This morning we’re going to try to listen and unpack Jesus’ lesson on priorities. Of course, you’ve heard the phrase, the pathway to hell is paved with good intentions. Look in Luke chapter 14. When we think about priorities and excuse making, Luke 14 stands perhaps above the rest. Just a few chapters over, note this parable in Luke 14, beginning in verse 16. Jesus said to him, A man once gave a great banquet, invited many. And at the time for the banquet, he sent his servant to say to those who have been invited, come, for everything is now ready. But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said to him, I have bought a field and I must go out and see it. Please have me excused.

And another said, I have bought five yoke of oxen, and I go to examine them. Please have me excused. Verse 20, and another said, I have married a wife, and therefore I cannot come. So the servant came and reported these things to his master, then the master of the house became angry and said to his servant, Go out quickly to the streets and lanes of the city, bring in the poor and the crippled and the blind and the lame. And the servant said, Sir, what you commanded has been done. And still there is room. And the master said to the servant, Go out to the highways and hedges and compel people to come in, that my house may be filled. For I tell you, none of these men who were invited shall taste my banquet.

We see that Jesus is very serious about following him and prioritizing that which is right. Of course, God, or Jesus is the head of this house, he is the king, throwing this great feast. And you see that many were invited in verse 16 and 17.

And what happens immediately? Immediately the excuses begin. Of course, we understand excuses are a problem, and when we say that you’re making an excuse, that’s not a positive thing. Now, sometimes excuses are necessary, and by definition, they’re not bad. If you have to go take something that’s a higher priority, if you need to be with family, you need to be with a loved one who’s ailing or is sick or in trouble, you make time. And that you might say excuses you from work, from school, from what something else you might need to be doing. But what about these excuses is interesting. If you note the first, as we go to verse 18, what is mentioned here? Is this a bad thing? Is this a terrible thing?

In verse 18, I have bought a field. I must go out and see it. Please have me excused. Certainly there’s nothing wrong about this. It makes good business sense that if he’s going to buy a field, he should go and inspect it and take advantage of it. In verse 19, we see the second one, I have bought five yoke of oxen, I go to examine them, and again, please have me excused. And even in verse 20, even though the request you might say, the respectful denial of this application to come to the feast isn’t even put forward. He just says, I have married a wife, I cannot come. Nothing is wrong with these things. In fact, when you examine the Jewish law for a man to marry his wife, he was to have a year set apart with her.

And so you might say to a degree, this is somewhat lawful, until you remember that going to a feast wouldn’t be violation of that law. So as we think about these excuses, then we have to we’re confronted with this big question. Like Martha, were any of these people doing something wrong? Well, we do know from the conclusion of this parable, what is the result? What does the king decide? He goes out and they invite in the poor, the lame, the sick, the blind, and even when they’re not filled yet, they bring even more in from the highways and the hedges. They compel that people come in. Why? First of all, because the king knows and cares about them. But also, as we see in verse 24, I tell you, none of those men who were invited.

Those who made excuses, those who rejected me, those who prioritize something instead, shall taste my banquet. There’s nothing inherently sinful about buying a field. There’s nothing inherently sinful about buying five oxen and examining them. And certainly there’s nothing wrong in the old or new covenant with marrying a bride. But as you consider the excuses that were made, Jesus was not being put first. The king was not being prioritized. Again, very common, very easy to understand, and easy platitude to preach and for everyone to agree, yes, I need to be better, yes, I need to do more, yes, I need to put Christ first. But if you go back to Luke chapter 10 and you look at verse 42, I want to emphasize that phrasing. Look back in Luke chapter 10 and verse 42.

3. One Thing Is Necessary

When he says in verse 41, Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things. We see she has this problem. She has this problem that Jesus understands. And in verse 42, he doesn’t just point out Mary. He says, one thing is necessary. What is that? Well, if you look at what was Mary’s example in verse 39, she had a sister named Mary who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teachings. Putting Jesus first is more than just doing a bunch of good things. It’s listening to and being changed by the word of God. When we examine the scriptures and we see that Jesus says there’s a high cost to following him, look in Luke chapter 9. The very end of Luke chapter 9 and verse 57.

What does Jesus expect of his disciples? What does it mean to put Jesus first? In verse 57 of Luke 9, as they were going along the road, someone said to him, I will follow you wherever you go. The grand attitude, the great example. In verse 58, Jesus said to him, Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head. To another, he said, Follow me, but he said, Lord, let me first go and bury my father. And Jesus said, Then leave the dead to bury their own dead, but as for you, go and proclaim the kingdom of God. Yet another said, I will follow you, Lord, but let me first say farewell to those at my home.

And Jesus said to him, No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God. We’re again confronted with this problem that it’s not just about doing good things, but it’s about doing the best thing. How many Christian dilemmas would be solved if we focused rather most on pleasing God as opposed to what is not, what is getting away with the line of sin? If we focused on putting God first, if we fulfilled the words of Colossians chapter 3, putting our mind on things above, putting our mind where Jesus is, seated at the right hand of God. How different would our life and our choices be? It wouldn’t even be a consideration to first go and do something.

4. Putting Christ First Necessitates Serving Others

It wouldn’t be a consideration to be caught up with some sort of physical labor because we recognize Jesus has what? The words of life. When we study the scriptures and we see, like in John chapter 4, when Jesus is with the woman at the well and she wants this water and she needs this food, he says, I have the water with which you’ll never need to drink again. And of course, we know in John chapter 6, Jesus is the bread of life. We have to take time, not just to study the Bible, but to be changed by the word. And please let me emphasize the second point. Putting Christ first absolutely necessitates serving others. But that doesn’t mean that that should surpass everything else in its place.

Look in Luke chapter 10 again with that parable of the Good Samaritan. In verse 25, notice the lawyer, and note how the chapter ends. This is very interesting the way Luke paired these stories together. They’re not necessarily chronologically immediately following, but Luke pairs them in chapter 10. In verse 25, behold a lawyer stood up to put him to the test, saying, Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life? And he said to him, What is written in the law? How do you read it? And he answered, You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself. Now, if you know in this parable of the Good Samaritan, which of those did the Good Samaritan adhered to?

Well, certainly by loving his neighbor, he loved God. But the emphasis of the Good Samaritan was what? He stopped and took care of somebody in need. He showed true love for his neighbor. That wasn’t caught up by some demographical difference. It wasn’t caught up by some money difference or economical differences. He stopped and helped somebody in need. The dreaded Samaritan showed what true love is. In the inverse, we see Mary is focused on the first part of verse 27. Right in verse 27, of course, what was the lawyer’s answer that was correct? First, you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind. How did Mary show that? When Jesus came in, what was she preoccupied with?

Sitting at the feet of the master teacher. Sitting at the feet of the one who had the words of life. We must serve others, yes. We must serve others, as John 13, 34 and 35 says, as Jesus gives this new commandment that we love others and serve others, as Jesus has served us, as he has died for us. That’s a heavy burden to bear, to love like Jesus, to sacrifice like Jesus has. But let’s stop for a minute and make sure that we’re not just giving out platitudes and making real application here. Does everyone agree Jesus must be put first in everything? Of course. Does everyone agree that putting Christ first brings in serving others? Of course. But when you look at Luke 14, the parable of the great banquet, and you look at Luke chapter 10 with Martha, it’s not just about doing some good things.

5. We Have a Priority and Busyness Problem

It’s about pleasing the Messiah. That’s a difference that we have to understand. In this world, we get so busy. We’re so caught up with ball games and with concerts and with taxes to be paid and jobs to be worked and advancements to be had and promotions to get and family to please and friends to be with. That we often substitute God in where we have cracks in our schedule rather than putting God in first. And as if that’s not enough of a problem, perhaps you’re like me, when you have cracks in your schedule, those often get filled at the last second by something else. Something that we allow to take priority over whatever it is we originally would have done. If we’re not put in God first, it will show.

And in a society that wears busyness and being active as a badge of honor, we have to combat that mindset that says it’s only worth honor if I’m using the time to please God. It is only pleasing God if I have stopped everything and put Jesus first. As he said in Luke chapter 9 and verse 62, no one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God. Does Jesus say the price of discipleship is high? Absolutely, he does. In fact, that’s the next story in Luke chapter 14, after the parable of the great banquet, he moves on to the high cost of following after Jesus. We have to count that cost, but if we’re going to be Christians, we’re going to claim to put Jesus first.

It means a changed life. It means that it won’t just be about, can I serve others? Check. Have I been to church assemblies? Check. Have I prayed? Check. But rather, I need to talk to my Heavenly Father. I will make time and a priority for my God who took the time and made it a priority to listen to and be there for me. Isn’t that amazing? That we have a God who will be there anytime we ask. And sometimes we don’t make time for that creator who’s eagerly there waiting for us, wanting his children to speak to him. If it’s so obvious and so easy to understand that Jesus must be put first in everything, and it’s so obvious and easy to know that we need to serve others.

Why do we struggle? I would put forward this morning, it’s not a conceptual problem at all. We have a priority and busyness problem. And it’s because we don’t even think about it. We’re so caught up in this life. We’re so caught up in the White House and Washington, D.C., and our sports teams and our vacation plans and our family plans and our family and friends and work drama. We’re so consumed with problems in this life, we forget about the answer to all of them, and that is Christ Jesus. How did Mary show that? She sat at the feet of Jesus. She prioritized. When Martha calls her out, Jesus doesn’t condemn Martha for wrongdoing. He says, You’re missing on the verse 42, one necessary thing. That which is lasting, that which will survive.

We have to examine this morning what is the cost of not putting Jesus first and it’s giving it up. Jesus says, you follow me all in, or you are out. You count the cost of following me. The price is high, but to be with me is worth it all. You can choose, we can make that choice, but I’m afraid we make the choice without even knowing we’re doing it by filling our schedules without putting God in first. We’re making our choice, even though we’d never say the words, I put Jesus second out loud. Examine your month as we draw to a close, unbelievably so to about the first fourth of the calendar year. What happened to our New Year’s resolutions? I know you see more of me probably than there was two months ago.

That means that resolution didn’t go well. How does that happen? In part because we want what we want, and our resolutions are difficult because it makes us be challenged. But part of it’s because, unlike Jesus, who in John chapter 13 loves sacrificially, we’re not willing to give up something to put Jesus first. What am I willing to give up? As I examine my schedule, unless I think I’m perfect at this, I have to have some room in my schedule for Jesus. And if I don’t, I have to make it. So as I think this morning, where is my time going? Is too much going to work? Is too much going to extracurricular activities as or for my teenagers or my kids.

6. We Must Redeem the Time

Not enough to worship, prayer, and hard work in the kingdom of God. There’s one necessary thing. We can’t afford to miss it. We must redeem the time. Ephesians chapter 5, of course, we know that phrase, but note what it’s sandwiched by in Ephesians chapter 5. As you consider the words of the Apostle Paul in Ephesians chapter 5, he says, look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise, but as wise doing what? Verse 16, making the best use of the time, redeeming the time. Why? Because the days are evil. Verse 17, therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. It’s very strange to me that in verse 16 you have these two phrases: making the best use of the time, redeeming, buying back the time.

Why? Because the days are evil. The days aren’t necessarily inherently evil. It doesn’t mean that it’s a choice between going to worship or committing some great sin. It’s a choice constantly between doing what is best in the kingdom or trying to make the kingdom fit around my time and my wishes and desires. To redeem the time means to look carefully how you walk. Verse 15, plan your steps. Make this choice. And can I add one part about this one necessary thing? Time is one commodity that we don’t know how long we get. We don’t know how much we’ll have. All we know is everybody, every day gets the same amount of time if the Lord wills we all live through it. And we will never get it back.

Conclusion

Our time can greatly change a family tree. It can change a work dynamic. It can change a family dynamic. It can change the dynamic of a local church. Our time has to be spent wisely. It has to be spent in a planned way. Planning what? To put Jesus first, to meditate on the word, and to serve him. As usual, kids often say it best, and I want to close with an illustration. Perhaps you’ve heard this. A man came home from work late again, tired and irritated. As he came to the door, he found his eight-year-old sitting waiting for him. Daddy, may I ask you a question? Sure. What is it, son? The man replied. Daddy, how much money do you make per hour? The husband and father replied angrily, What does that matter?

What does it matter to you? Why would you ask me such a thing? And the little boy said, please tell me, how much do you make an hour? He said, if you must know, I make $20 an hour. Oh, the little boy said, looking down. He said, Can I borrow $10? The father was furious. He said, if the only reason you wanted to know how much money I made was so that you could borrow money for me, that you could take my time and my hard work and buy some frivolous toy, then you need to go to your room, go to your bed, and think about how selfish you’re being. Little boy quietly left and went to his room and shut the door. As the man was sitting there, as the father was meditating on what had happened and speaking with his wife, he was getting more and more frustrated.

How dare my son ask me such questions? How dare he just want me for my money? But after a while, Cooler had prevailed. He calmed down and started to think maybe he had been a little too hard on his son. After all, he never really asked for money much. Maybe there was something with that $10 he desperately needed to buy. The man went to the door of the little boy’s room and opened the door. He said, Are you asleep, son? He said, No, I’m awake, Daddy. I’ve been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier. It’s been a long day, and I took my frustration out on you. Here’s the $10 that you ask for. The little boy sat straight up beaming, oh, thank you, Daddy.

And reaching under his pillow, he pulled out some crumpled up, wadded-up bills. And the father again is frustrated. He said, You already had money, why did you ask for more if you already had some? The little boy said, Because I didn’t have enough. But now I do. Dad, I have $20 now. Can I please have an hour of your time? Little kids understand what it means to love. They understand what it means to have time with somebody who loves them. As we think about all the men and women who have shaped our lives, all the people who have spent time with you, changed you, molded you, encouraged you to be better. You think and you realize how valuable time is. It’s not about putting money on a problem.

It’s not just about driving a meal to somebody who’s in need. It’s not about giving somebody anything that they’ve asked for. It’s about being with somebody, showing love and compassion and being willing to sacrifice self all the way Jesus already has for us. When we make priorities of our time, it means putting God first, meaning when I read his will and I see what his commands are for me, I need to change my life to be in accordance with them. And if I do that, the rest will fall into place. If my priorities are right, perhaps the priorities of others will follow. When we think about men and women who have gone on before us, great soldiers of faith, like Brother Jerry Davis. We know what a thankful blessing it is to have them from God, to learn what it means to put God first in this life second.

To know if there is a victory worth winning. We need to trust in Jesus and not just make it a platitude. We need to truly put him first, not be caught up with serving in this life like Martha, not just checking list off a box. But putting God first. Sitting at his feet, reading the words of life and praying to him and thanking him every day that forgiveness and salvation can be ours. We have an awesome God who deserves our respect, our time, and to be put first even at the cost of everything else that otherwise would take its place. We have a great God who wants us to be his.

But do you trust him enough to obey? Do you love him enough to sacrifice? Have you counted the cost of following Jesus? Recognize if you’re here this morning, you’ve never become a Christian, that blessing is there. Our God is waiting. He is holding his arms out for you like the prodigal father in Luke chapter 15, and like God did in Romans chapter 10 to even the rebellious and disobedient Israelites. He wants you to come home to Him, to trust Him. But you have to put Him first. Submit to what he said. Believe in Jesus as the Christ, the Son of the Living God. Confess Him as Lord, not just of the world and in creation, but over your time and in your life as the priority, deserving of every fiber of your being, an ounce of effort that you can muster.

Repent of your wrongdoing and be baptized for the forgiveness of your sins. Don’t get caught up in this world. Be caught up with God. If you’re here and you are a Christian and you’re struggling to keep that balance, recognize God will forgive you. If you confess your sins, He is faithful and just to forgive you and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Trust in God today. If we can help you in any way, come forward as we stand and sing the invitation song.

Yes, what came down from heaven’s glory.

Well you survived to the safer to his after you do not come to know his favor, you will save you saved you now.