Taming the Tongue

Introduction

Good morning.

We’ll see. You’ll turn your Bibles to James chapter 3 with me. It’s a wonderful morning when we can gather together and worship the Lord our God. Amen?

In James chapter 3, one of people’s favorite topics, something that many people have down to a science, of course, right? In James chapter 3 and verse 1, James writes, Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. For we all stumble in many ways, and if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also, though they are so large and driven by strong winds, they’re guided by a very small rudder, wherever the will of the pilot directs.

So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a fire is set ablaze by such a small fire. Of course, we all have our tongues perfectly restrained, right? One Greek sage said, I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

I already see some head nods. And the fact of the matter is, we all kind of know whether whether we are forthright in acknowledging that or not. We have struggled in that way. We have said things we dearly want to take back, want to never have happened. But what’s the problem with words? What’s the problem with those biding remarks? They can never be repealed. Once they’re said, they are out there. In fact, the better question would not have been, have you ever said something you regret? But how many times have you said something that you wish had never even come to mind? And as we see James chapter 3 and verse 5, we see at the conclusion of that verse, it might blend into verse 6 in your biblical text.

It says, How great a force is set ablaze by such a small fire? And frankly, that’s what we’re dealing with this morning. We’re looking at trying to tame the tongue that on its own right is very small. If you consider the composition of your body, what percentage would your tongue take up? And yet, if if I considered the portfolio, if you will, of my sins, I wonder how high that percentage would be of things relegated to my mouth and words that I’ve said, actions I’ve taken based on how I’ve either spoken or perhaps even been spoken to. And you see in James chapter 3 and verse 1, what is the context of this passage anyhow? We know James chapter 2, highlighted by verse 19. You believe that God is one, you do well, even the demons believe and shudder.

Do you want to be shown, you foolish person, that faith apart from works is useless? And it concludes in verse 26. For as the body apart from the spirit is dead, so also faith apart from works is dead. And we know James chapter 2, but what is the very next verse? What is the warning? That not many of you should become teachers. Now, if you consider that, that kind of strikes at the heart of a lot of what we preach and teach about, isn’t it? Doesn’t that even kind of go against what Jesus said in the Great Commission? Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every living creature. But what is the dynamic spoken of? Look at the end of verse 1. You see it in verse 2 clearly.

You see at the end of verse 1, that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. Now, why might that be? Why would the greater strictness be measured against the teacher? Well, that seems very obvious. First and foremost, you would consider that the teacher is teaching. They should be knowledgeable about the subject. But secondly, what does a teacher have that the student does not have? Hopefully, listening ears, influence. And so, with my tongue, if I use a position of influence in teaching for wrong, lying purposes, what have I done? I may not have only affected myself, an interesting note to consider in James chapter 3, the emphasis on self’s defiling that comes at the hands of our own tongue, but also those who were listening to me.

That’s a heavy charge to consider, a heavy burden. And in verse 2, we see the point that we all know, for we all stumble in many ways, certainly. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man. Who was that perfect man who did not stumble in what he said? Who did not have a problem sinning with his tongue? That of course is Jesus the Christ. It can be done. We can restrain our tongue from letting unwholesome words pour out, like we’re exhorted to in Ephesians chapter 4. We can use our tongue for good, but how do we do that? Is there a way to tame the tongue? I have bad news for you. Keep reading with me in verse 6.

And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird of reptile and sea creature can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind. But no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. Perhaps it would have been more intriguing this morning if I had opened by looking at verse 5 and saying, what if I describe to you this problem that we all have? And it’s a small fire. It involves a world of iniquity. It is full of deadly poison. Would I have your interest? But no human being, verse 8, can tame the tongue.

Are we on mission impossible this morning and in our lives? How can we do this very thing that we know is sinful? How can we stop that action if the Bible itself, the words of God, the inspired words of life, say, you can’t do it. Consider the idea of taming the tongue. You see in verse 7, who is it that we have tamed? We’ve tamed the animals. We’ve tamed them. You can domesticate dogs and to some extent cats. But in verse 8, you can’t tame the tongue. Because even when someone has their tongue in check, if you will, what is it like? Is it just laying down and saying, You beat me into submission, I’m good. No, it is a restless evil. It’s seeking to get out.

1. Powerful Comparisons of Such a Little Member

It’s like a caged animal. The minute it is given opportunity, that small spark escapes. And we know that when that small spark escapes, when we know just a little bit of lethal poison is injected, there’s great ruin and destruction in its wake. And so I want to start this morning by examining some of the powerful comparisons of such a little member to such a large extent. Do you see that? The first one in verse 3. James uses three illustrations. Two of them run parallel, and one is slightly different. But let’s start with the first. In verse 3. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. If you’ve ever seen horses, they’re magnificent creatures.

They’re beautiful. You might watch them even race, and they’re powerful, they’re wonderful, and you think this is a mighty creation of God, and they truly are. And what’s amazing about horses, if you’ve never seen them in person, is that they are quite large. They are very big animals. And you know what’s really funny about these huge animals? You see them running around, they’re gigantic. You think you’d say they’re at the top of the food chain, and then who are they controlled by? Well, some little four and five-year-old boy or girls, right? Have you ever seen a little kid riding a horse? Isn’t it amazing that a horse that is this large and larger and weighs an exorbitant amount of pounds relative to that of a little child is in control and in the submission.

You consider with just the reins, that horse can be controlled. You see with me in verse 4. Look at the ships also, though they are so large and driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder. Wherever the will of the pilot directs, if you don’t think a horse is big enough, consider a ship. And consider this ship in the midst of the water, and it goes wherever it wants, right? Better not, that’s not a ship I’m getting on. Wherever the pilot directs, at the will of the steersman, is where that ship is directed. Again, because of the rudder. But if you compare the rudder, if you compared the steering engine of the ship to the size of the ship in its entirety, it is just a very small percentage makeup.

And yet, without that piece, would any of us say, sign me up for that ship? We would be terrified. Why? Because the ship is large, it’s powerful. But that little piece brings it all under control. So look at me at verse 5, and you see the final comparison. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a force is set ablaze by such a small fire. And I don’t know if you notice the difference between the fire in verse 5 from the horse’s bit and the ship’s rudder in verses 3 and 4. Do you see what that is? A horse and a ship can come under control. Consider if you let one spark out into a forest. What control do you have over that?

Nothing. Your only recourse is to put it out, to stop it. You can’t control it. You need to put it out. And so we see that is the danger that we’re playing with. Consider over time how the tongue boasts of great things. You look at history and it’s riddled with great men of rhetoric, right? You see, Hitler, he was very successful because of why? His rallying speeches. It is undeniable that he was the leader of mass atrocities that this world has never seen, and I pray will never see again. But the fact was, he got people behind him. And he was very good in his speeches. And you consider as a more positive example of Martin Luther King Jr. How many speeches did he give that we remember today?

All of us know, if I were to start by saying, I have a dream who I’m citing, and perhaps even the idea behind that great speech. The tongue has powerful impact. And we’ve seen both a good and bad on a mass scale, but just think in your own family unit. How has the tongue caused great stress? The tongue over time has destroyed countless families. Countless marriages. An unfortunate number of churches have been split because people didn’t control what truly is just a small member. And in a way, it’s embarrassing. And sin certainly should not be frowned upon in any way, other than to realize the wages of sin is death, but frankly, it is an embarrassment that we cannot control the small part of us, and yet it is so pervasive in our lives.

And why is that? Because the tongue, unlike many other actions, many other sins that we can commit, happens like that. You think it and you can say it. And that’s it. To stage many other types of sins, it takes premeditated thought. Often, what do we do if we want to get back at someone? We have some plan, we have some setup, right? If you want to get back at someone, if you have evil in your mind, how long does it take to say that, to spread that spark of evil? It takes the minute for your tongue to move. And that can be immediate. So consider with me again as we look at verse 5. Look at these descriptions of the tongue. We see that it is a fire, verse 5.

It is a restless evil, verse 8. And it is full of deadly poison in verse 8. If I ask you to close your eyes, which I’m not going to do, and consider for a moment, have you seen a tongue commit any of these things that could be described as full of deadly poison? You would know when that’s happened, and perhaps maybe you yourself even were the one to have spread it. This is a serious issue for serious Christians. The tongue is sinful when we use it that way. We need to see, brothers and sisters, that what Jesus outlines, what the New Testament author authors clearly designate as sin and misuses of the tongue will cost us our soul. And the problem is not only as if it mattered anything, past that, will it cost us our soul?

2. The Tongue Reveals Our Allegiance

It will cost us all of our very life and the good things in this life if we don’t get it under control. And so the question is, how can I do that? Will you look with me at verse 9? Luckily the text didn’t end with, but no human being contained the tongue. On to the next chapter. In verse 9, with it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring pour forth from the same opening, both fresh and salt water? Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.

And you consider this text, and you see in verse 9, with it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people, and you see the problem of the tongue. It’s not just there, it’s not just there to be an impediment. There is a positive use of it. Consider the absurdity of being in this church building and singing songs in this hymn book. You think about amazing grace. You think about the songs we sung this morning, I’ll fly away. And then just an hour or two after 12 o’clock this very afternoon, we’re using hateful speech. We’re using profanity. We’re saying things that a Christian ought not to say. And it is a disgrace to the Lord that we would act in such a way that we would try to, out of our one mouth seem one way, praising God, and out of our mouth in another way, curse men.

Do you see the problem with that? It is an identification. Look with me in Matthew chapter 26. I want to consider something that endangered Peter here. In Matthew chapter 26, in verse 73. Now many of us knew that Peter was going to sin through reading the gospel accounts, and we know that he did, in fact, sin in his denial of Jesus three times, as Jesus had prophesied. But when you see verse 73 of Matthew chapter 26, you understand something about speech from this. When Peter’s in the midst of his denials, read verse 73 with me. After a little while, the bystanders came up and said to Peter, certainly you two are one of them. Why? How do they know? For your accent betrays you. And you see, well, his accent betrays him.

That makes plenty of sense. I don’t see the application. We’re coming there. If we were to have visitors, and we’re blessed with visitors most every Sunday here, thanks to Mickey Mouse for that. And we meet people and you hear them talk, and guess what? You have a general idea of where they’re from. We understand from accents because it designates, it gives us an idea, even if it’s wrong, of an idea of where someone may be from. Maybe where they were brought up, maybe where they are currently living. The accent gives away someone, perhaps even listening to the words they say. Go into Alabama and say Coke, and who knows what you’ll come out with to drink. They use different words, even. Peter was identified in that way.

And we would be foolish to say that we are not identified the same way. Not only by our accent, but much more by the content of our words. We see as a Christian, people not dressing a certain way, what do we assume? Probably not a Christian. If we see someone in a uniform, what do we assume? Probably working for that organization. But if you see with me that our talk, our word choice does the same things, we’ll understand the power of that. Today I want to give a sad illustration just this past week. I was driving along somewhere somewhat nearby, and there was a car wash going on. And I thought and thought to myself, what is the most polite way to say this? But there was a girl on the road holding a sign that talked about the car wash.

And she was wearing, this is the best way I could think to say this, less than half of what many of us are wearing today. And, you know, that’s generally what you see at beaches and at different water parks and such if you go around the world. But what was disturbing to me was who the car wash was for. It was for a youth group at a church. And I gotta tell you, my thought on that is how can that be? How can people from a church claiming to believe in Christ, represent themselves in such a way? And then I have to be careful to judge, because then I consider my portfolio of ways I’ve spoken to people, whether ways I’ve spoken to people who are working and I’m having an issue with, ways I’ve spoken to my spouse, my family, my friends, and I consider, I don’t act like I’m a Christian either.

Because the tongue reveals our allegiance. Do you see that? Back in James chapter 3 in verse 10. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing, my brothers, these things ought not to be so. That’s not the way it should be. In verse 11, in fact, it’s not the way it is. Does a spring pour forth from the same opening, both fresh and salt water? What is the answer? No. That is not what happens. We need to be Christians always. Amen. We need to control our tongue. We need to tame it. It’s not impossible it is impossible, perhaps, to say, I have this fully mastered, it will never again be a problem. But it absolutely and positively must be contained. If you look with me in Ephesians chapter 4, passage I cited earlier, turn with me to Ephesians chapter 4.

I think we’re rampant with digital Bibles again. But if you do have, don’t have a Bible, please take one out of the pew in front of you and look with me at Ephesians chapter 4 and verse 29. Ephesians chapter 4 and verse 29, Paul says, let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up. As if it’s the occasion that it may give grace to those who hear. Now we see both facets of what we’ve been talking about there. What is the second part of what we notice? There is a positive use of the tongue for building up. But what do you see? Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouth. We can do this. We must do this.

But consider with me in Ephesians chapter 5 and verse 3. But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetous covetousness must not even be named among you as is proper among saints. Let there be no filthiness, nor foolish talk, nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. I find it interesting that in verse 3 and 4, among words such as sexual immorality and impurity and covetousness, there is also no foolish talk, or to be no crude joking. This is not how a Christian talks. And when I do this, I have not only tarnished my reputation, but I have tarnished perhaps even the reputation of the Lord. Because after all, when people see me, what are they to see? A light in the world.

3. We Need to Be Guarding the Gate

A Christian. And when I talk in a way that is not a Christian, the law of science says what comes out of a pond, a stream. Either fresh water or salt water. And if I am speaking these vile things, I am not of the Lord. And it is that simple. I need to determine where is my allegiance. And to help in doing that, look at what Jesus said in Matthew chapter 12. We need to be guarding the gate, if you will. One of the biggest struggles with the tongue, as already mentioned, is that the minute I think it, I can say it. And so let’s attack the problem where it begins. In Matthew chapter 12, note with me in verse 33, Jesus sets his own context for this passage.

Either make the tree good and its fruit bad, or make the tree bad and its fruit bad. For the tree is known by its fruit. You brood of vipers, how can you speak good when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. I’m gonna read that again. For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. So if I am involved in crude joking and lying and gossip and slander in any of these ways that tear down rather than build up, where does that come from? It comes from my heart. And now you see why we’re in trouble. Now you see where the hypocrisy has no place in the life of a Christian because it will come out. There is no double life.

You can fool me, you can fool yourself. But we won’t fool God. Because when I talk in a certain way that is unbecoming of my Christian faith, and the praises I sing to God and the prayers I offer before his throne, the hypocrisy is seen right through by our Maker. You see, in verse 35, the good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. I tell you, on the day of judgment, people will give account for every careless word they speak. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned. And so what do we need to do? We need to be storing up this good treasure.

What do we want to slip out of our mouths? Good things. What a problem that would be. You know, I just I have to tell you, I’m sitting down with the elders, and this is a make believe story, you’ll see that. I’m sitting down with the elders, and they say, How can we help you in your Christian walk? And I say, You know, I just really have this problem. Maybe you can help. And then they say, Come out with it. What is it? I said, you know, I just talk to people and I just spend way too much time. It just slips out. I just build them up. I’m just far too kind. I’m just constantly encouraging and complimentary, and I just help people too much.

Would you help me with that problem? You can see that’s not the case necessarily. But what a great problem that would be. How would we get to that way? We would be training our hearts and our minds to think the best rather than worse than the worst. Sometimes I might say profound things. I’m about to say one here. Garbage in, garbage out. Profound. Right? We need to guard the gate. That means limiting what we expose ourselves to in the realm of negativity, in the realm of gossip. How do you pass on gossip? When it is passed to you, when you become aware of the information, what’s an easy way to not pass up gossip? Turn down any opportunity to listen to it. What is a way to not slander?

Think of the best. Realize the consequences of that fire that we are putting out there. That fire that will consume the whole forest. And perhaps one way to do that is to remember those times that I wish I had just stayed silent. And realizing the cost that came with my lack of guarding the gate. Consider with me also in Romans chapter 12 and verse 9, where Paul writes, Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil, cling to what is good. What do we need to do? We need to hate evil. How do these words come to our mind? Because we don’t hate them for what they are. We need to recognize that sin is sin and be nowhere near it. This is the problem. When we try to straddle the line, when we come right up against what we can say and do and watch and listen to, that goes into our mind.

Let us not be deceived. We need to love what is good. We need to cling to it. Because that’s how we guard our hearts. That’s how we distance ourselves from the very evil that our tongue and all the world of sin that Satan throws at us gets us. We start thinking about it, we meditate on it, and guess what happens next? It just happens. We can take charge of that, and we must. Consider with me in James chapter 1 and verse 19. In James chapter 1 and verse 19. Paul says, know this, my beloved brothers. Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. I’d have to say that the majority of my sins of speech would completely disappear. If I would just heed the words of James chapter 1 and verse 19.

4. Realize the Impacts and the Reality

Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger. Because what have we done? We’ve slowed the reaction time. We’ve given ourselves a chance to act out of our good treasure rather than the junk that we’ve let slip by our gate. Consider with me one final point. We need to realize the impacts and the reality. The reality is in verse 12 of James chapter 3 Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water. This type of talking out of both ends of our mouth cannot happen. When we do that, whose side are we on? Because it is not the Lord’s. This is a heavy responsibility. This is a constant struggle after all.

Conclusion

What is the tongue? It is a restless evil. What does restless mean? It does not rest. It doesn’t stop. We must continue fighting this. But we can sure help things out if we realize the impact that our using our tongue for good can have. If we realize what life would be like if the world was kind, if the world built up rather than seeking to tear down and lift self up at the expense of others. I want to conclude with you in James chapter 1 and verse 26. Look with me there. In James chapter 1 and verse 26. If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue, but deceives his heart. This person’s religion is worthless. I would do well to remember the words of I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

But I would do eternally well if I would remember that to have a religion that’s worth something, I will bridle my tongue and not deceive my heart. Will you go to God and pray with me at this time? Our dear God, our most gracious and loving Heavenly Father, we praise you for your greatness. You are the Almighty. You are the true and living God. You spoke in this world came into creation. O Lord, we are so thankful for all that you’ve done to bless us, to set up this world, giving us dominion over the birds of the air and over the creeping things of this earth. Our Lord, we pray that you forgive us of our sins. Forgive us of when we speak as we shouldn’t, when we slander, when we gossip, when we lie.

When we seek to get ahead rather than seeking to just be with you. Lord, help us to be holy as you are holy. Help us to have the strength and courage and conviction to say no to those things that pollute our minds, that damage our hearts, and influence our standing with you. Help us, O Lord, to be dedicated disciples of yours in all ways, and not just the ones that are simple and easy. O Lord, we thank you for sending Jesus the Christ to die on the cross for our sins. You have shown us great love. You have shown us grace and mercy and forgiveness. Help us to show those qualities to others as well. We pray that as we worship you today, that we will do so pleasing in your sight, that we will truly be seeking just to know what you would have us do and to do it in the way that you would have us worship you.

Help us to go into our Bible classes with open hearts and minds. Help us help the teachers to teach in a way that is true to your word and helpful to the students. Help us always to wage our influence for good and to serve you with all of our might. And it’s in Jesus’ name we do pray. Amen.