The Way They Should Go Is Away From The World

Introduction

There we go. Okay. Brother Bowman was with us last Sunday, and he gave us two wonderful lessons on family, and there we are. All right. Two wonderful lessons on parenting and family. And our theme for this month is on that, parenting. And we titled it Parenting 226. And some of you are wondering, well, where does that come from? Well, the idea was in school you go to classes like Biology 101 or you go to English Lip 300, whatever it might be. But where are the classes on really the most important things like how to raise a family? And you don’t really go to school for those kinds of things. You won’t ever go to a parenting class 101. But God’s word provides us the information that we need.

And of course, the 226 is taken from Proverbs 22 and verse 6. Train up a child in the way he should go. And when he is old, he will not depart from it. And so that is our focus throughout this month as we focus on parenting. Of course, this is a maxim. We understand that. A maxim meaning that it’s a it’s a principle that in general it is the rule. That typically, yes, if you train up a child in the way that he should go, then when he is old, he’ll not depart from it. We know that there are exceptions though to the rule. We know that there are parents who have done all they could to raise children who’d fear and love the Lord. And yet, because of this thing which we call free will, uh yet we have our own decisions to make, our own options to take, own courses to take.

And so many, unfortunately, have chosen not to even follow in the training of their parents. But we’re focusing throughout this month on training them in the way that they should, in fact, go. And of course, that aspect is not defined in the passage. All the passage says that you are to train them up in the way they should go. Well, what is the way? And our brother Bowman gave an excellent point last week that, you know, in some sense, every child has his own way, and we need to encourage that. But I’m going from the broader spiritual aspect of the way that he should go. And perhaps you’re even thinking of Matthew 7 and verses 13 and 14. Where our Lord there defines for us that there are but really two ways.

There is the narrow gate and the way that is difficult that leads to eternal life. But then, of course, there is the broad way and the smooth road that would lead to destruction. There are only one of two ways that you can take. And the point of that also being that if you choose to take one, then you are by necessity going away from the other. You can’t straddle the road. You can’t go two places at once. No, you’re either going towards eternal life and away from destruction, or you’re going towards destruction and away from eternal life. This morning we want to focus on the negative. We want to talk about getting them away from the world. We want to talk about getting them away from that path that leads ultimately to destruction.

1. The Headlines: Violence, Sex, Drugs and Alcohol

And then throughout the rest of the month, we’ll talk more about the positive aspect, about leading them in the ways of the Lord, leading them to the path that would, in fact, lead them to eternal life. Sometimes we talk about the news and what’s been in the headlines, and the headlines, as always, are tragic. Just this past week, there are the headlines. Teen who performed at Obama inaugural events. Shot dead in Chicago. I believe that funeral was yesterday. I believe the first lady was there. Shot dead in the park seemed to be a random act of violence, as far as I can tell. We hear news like that, and we think of the violence and the gangs and all the things happening in our society. And so we fear for our young, and we don’t want them to go down that path.

We hear headlines about sexual activity. Nearly three in ten young teens, not just teenagers, but young teens, sexually active, the headline reads. And we worry about drugs and alcohol and other kinds of intoxicants. And so we see headlines like teen alcohol use can cause brain damage. And so we’re fearful. And we don’t want our children going down these kinds of paths. And well, we shouldn’t, because even God warns against these things in the scriptures. I’m going to the book of Proverbs. We’re going to be in Proverbs and Ecclesiastes for the most part this morning. So I invite you to turn your Old Testament, first of all, to the book of Proverbs. Book of Proverbs is a man warning his son, giving instruction to his children about both the way they should go and the paths of life that they ought not to take.

And all these things are found there in Proverbs. We don’t think of street gangs as being a problem in Old Testament times, but you know what? Proverbs chapter 1 starts with him warning his son against the gang. Be warned against those who would be engaged in violence. We’ll not take time to read all these passages. But starting in chapter 1 and beginning of verse 8. Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. Indeed, there are a graceful wreath to your head, an ornaments about your neck. My son, as sinners entice you, do not consent. If they say, Come with us, let us lie and wait for blood. Let us ambush the innocent without cause. Let us swallow them alive like Sheol, even whole as those who go down to the pit.

We will find all kinds of precious wealth. We will fill our houses with spoil. Throw in your lot with us. We shall all have one purse. My son, do not walk in the way with them. Keep your feet from their path, for their feet run to evil, and they hasten to shed blood. And it is useless to spread the bait of net in the sight of any bird, but they lie in wait for their own blood. They ambush their own lives. So are the ways of everyone who gains by violence. It takes away the life of its possessors. And the other passages mentioned here on the board are the same point that the wise man is making to his son. This seems enticing because by violence you can attain things in this life.

Don’t go down that path. It will lead to ruin. Sexual activity. The adulteress is considered in Proverbs 5 and also 6 and 7. Just read a couple of the passages out of Proverbs chapter 5. My son, give attention to my wisdom, incline your ear to my understanding, that you may observe discretion. Your lips may reserve knowledge. For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and smooth as an oil is her speech. But in the end, she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword. Fathers of daughters, I would take that passage and turn it on its head. And say, Daughters, that young man, his words, they drip honey. But don’t pay attention to them. What’s he warning against? This woman who is seducing you. And again, we can take it and go the opposite way.

Don’t pay attention to her. Why? For her feet go down to death. Her steps take hold of Sheol. She does not ponder the path of life. Her ways are unstable. She does not know it. And how many tragic consequences have we seen in life? Of young people engaging in sexual activity, hearts broken, emotions wrecked. And even because of what happens in their life, consequences to be had throughout life, whether it be by disease, unwanted children, consequences that would go on to future generations, and in some ways, even lead them away from the Lord. Don’t go down that path, the man is telling his son. And then even intoxicants, we go later in the book, chapter 20 and verse 1. Proverbs 20 and verse 1 wine is a mocker, strong drink, a brawler, and whoever is intoxicated by it is not wise.

Proverbs 23 and verses 29 through 25, another one of those passages that will be familiar to you. Who has woe, who has sorrow, who has contentions, who has complaining, who has cause without who has wounds without cause, who has redness of eyes, those who linger long over wine, those who go to taste mix wine. Do not look on the wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it goes down smoothly. At the last, it bites like a serpent and stings like a viper. And just go through these points to say that when we look at our world, and we are concerned with our children and future generations, and we think of these things, the same things that God was warning about 3,000 years ago.

2. The Subtle Way of the World: Wisdom and Wealth

But here’s the difficulty, perhaps. Is that oftentimes we as Christians and we as parents aren’t willing to admit that really the way of the world is much more subtle than this? These are the things that grab the headlines violence, sex, drugs, and alcohol. That grabs the headlines. But the way of the world is much more subtle. And the way of the world, in fact, are things that you and I may be glorying in and glorifying to our children. I mentioned the book of Ecclesiastes, because I’d like for us to go there now. We know from even the concluding chapters that Ecclesiastes was written with the youth in mind. The wise man here has experienced life. He has rejected paths of life, and now he is writing it for really the next generation.

He says in Ecclesiastes 11 and verse 9, rejoice, young man during your childhood. Let your heart be pleasant during the days of young manhood and follow the impulses of your heart and the desires of your eyes. You know that God will bring judgment or bring you to judgment for all these things. So remove grief and anger from your heart and put away pain from your body, because childhood and the prime of life are fleeting. Remember also your creator in the days of your youth, before the evil days come, and your years draw near, your years draw near when you will say, I have no delight in them. So we can understand that just as Proverbs was written for the next generation, and wisdom passing on to the children, Ecclesiastes as well.

And we are certainly familiar with what the whole point of Ecclesiastes is. It’s the point of life, the wise man says. The conclusion, verse 13 of chapter 12. When all has been heard is, fear God and keep his commandments, because this applies to every person. For God will bring every act to judgment, everything which is hidden, whether it is good or whether it is evil. So here’s the point of life, he’s saying. But to come to that conclusion, he first had to try other things in life. What does he try? What does he wind up rejecting? Well, first he tries wisdom. Being written from Solomon, we certainly understand that yes, yes, Solomon had wisdom. He had it, he was the wisest man there was. And so he says in Ecclesiastes chapter 1.

I’m going to begin reading in verse 16. The wisdom he attained and why he rejects it, I said to myself, Behold, I have magnified and increased wisdom more than all who were over Jerusalem before me. And my mind is observed a wealth of wisdom and knowledge, and I set my mind to know wisdom and to know madness and folly. And I realize that this also is striving after wind, because of much wisdom there is much grief, and increasing knowledge results in increasing pain. Here he says, I sought meaning in life. I followed this path of the world to attain wisdom and knowledge. Vanity is found in chapter 2, verses 12 through 17, and just to surmise that. What benefit does it ultimately give you? The fool dies, the wise dies, who’s going to remember it.

We all have the same faith. So why have I spent my whole life gaining wisdom and knowledge when it’s not going to do anything for me in the end? And then, of course, there’s wealth. There’s prosperity. Again in Ecclesiastes chapter 2. We’ll not take time to read all the things that Solomon attained for himself. But he says in verse 9, then I became great and increased more than all who preceded me in Jerusalem. My wisdom also stood by me. All that my eyes desired, I did not refuse him. I did not withhold my heart from any pleasure, for my heart was pleasured, I’m sorry, pleased because of all my labor, and this was my reward for all my labor. Thus I considered all my activities which my hand had done, and the labor which I had exerted, and behold, all was vanity and striving after the wind, and there was no profit under the sun.

Solomon had it all. I had my wisdom. I had wealth, I had pleasure. Vanity. Again, he goes into more detail in chapter 5, verses 10 through 17 of why he ultimately rejects it. Goods increase, those who eat them increase as well. There’s this idea that the more and more you try to attain, the more and more people are after, and it’s not going to last. And ultimately, again, just like the poor die, he would die too. What good is it going to do? Here’s the way of the world. It’s not just drugs, sex, and rock and roll. This is the way of the world. Get wisdom. Get wealth. These are the things that God warns us against throughout. Old Testament and New Testament. When Paul speaks of the world that had rejected God in Romans chapter 1 and verse 22, what does he say of them?

He says, they professed to be wise, they became fools. We’ve been studying in 1 Corinthians chapter 1 and chapter 2 in the auditorium class. What’s that whole passage about? That the wisdom of God was that he would send his son to be crucified for us. A stumbling block to the Jews, foolishness to the Greeks, but this is the true wisdom of God. It’s foolishness to the world. But this is wisdom of God. And so if you value the wisdom of the world more than the wisdom of God, you’ll reject God. And you’ll reject the message of his son. We’re warned against following the ways and the wisdom of the world. We’re warned against wealth. We could read so much of Matthew chapter 6, but just to summarize Jesus’ point, Matthew 6 and verse 24, no one can serve two masters, for either he’ll hate the one, love the other, or he’ll be devoted to one, despise the other.

You cannot serve God and wealth. Here’s why the problem’s scary. Because what is it that we want for our children? Wisdom and wealth.

Or to be violent people. None of us want our children to be engaged in sexually immoral behavior. None of us want our children to be enslaved to drugs and alcohol.

But most of us want for our children wisdom and wealth. We want for our children the way of the world. And might I submit to you that the things of which we view as the big problems are really the culmination of this way of the world to begin with. Wisdom and wealth. Man’s wisdom has now said that sexual activity outside of marriage is no big deal. It’s been saying that for a long time. Look what the wisdom of the world has done for us and what it is doing to future generations. Man’s seeking after wealth and pleasure has led to all kinds of violence and all kinds of people looking for the next high. It’s just the final manifestation of the ways of the world. And this is what we’re warned against.

3. Teaching: What Am I Teaching My Children?

This is the problem. This is the way of the world that we must train our children not to follow. So how can we help them? How can we train our children? There are three aspects of training. And all of you know this. There’s the teaching that must be done. There’s the observation that must take place. And then there’s the practice, the doing. All of us have had jobs where we had to be trained. My first full time job was working for my father in his veterinary clinic. And my father had a particular way that he wanted everything to be done, including the mopping out of the kennels, which, great, that was my job. And so he would first tell me, all right, here’s how you do it.

And then he would get the mop, and he would show me this is how you do it. And then he’d make me do it, and when I didn’t do it right, you go and you do it again. Janet’s brother is a doctor. Guess what he had to do? He had to be taught. Then he had to go and observe other doctors, and then he had to practice. Not only, but he had to practice. That’s the way people are trained, always. They’re taught, they observe, and they practice. When we are instructed to train up a child in the way that he should go, those three things are implied. Teaching, letting them observe, and then finally helping them to do. So what you and I have to be conscious of is what am I teaching my children?

Am I giving to them the messages that are contrary to what the world is feeding them? Super Bowl was last week. One of the reasons why people watch the Super Bowl is for the ads. Well, what’s an ad? It’s selling us something. Here’s what you need, here’s what you’ve got to have. That’s the message of the world. So, what am I teaching my children? Am I going to teach my children that while the ways of the world look good and they look enticing, even these things like wisdom and wealth, am I going to teach them that the true way which we ought to follow is to serve God? Not an excuse to do poorly in your schoolwork, not an excuse to be lazy and not provide for your family.

No, we’re not talking about that. We’re talking about the emphasis on our lives is following God, keeping his commandments. That is the duty of man. Am I going to teach my children that while it looks so good and appealing, and what man can attain in this life, really, it is ultimately not satisfying.

And then finally it won’t last. Let me tell you, if I’m just expecting them to hear that from other people, it’s not going to happen. That’s got to come out of my mouth. They’ve got to hear it from my lips.

4. Am I Letting Them Observe?

They’ve got to be taught. And while we’ve got wonderful Bible teachers, and everyone has a Bible, it’s not enough for me just to rely on the fact that they’re going to read it someday for themselves. Or a good elder who really cares for them is going to make sure they know that it’s got to come from my lips. And it’s got to come from your lips to your children. Am I letting them observe? We’re familiar with a passage in Deuteronomy chapter 6 and verses 5 through 9, where it talks about the law of God, how it’s to be laid up in their hearts, and then they were to teach their children, talking to them. I think applying that passage too is letting them observe. You know, this is supposed to be a constant thing for the Israelites.

If that law was really laid up in their hearts, then the fathers would be enacting that law and practicing that law, and their children would see it, and they could talk to them about it. So what are my children going to observe in my life? Are they going to see, you know what, dad really is concerned with knowing a lot. Or dad really is occupied with the finances. Dad sure does talk about that a lot. Or are they going to observe in my life charity and love for God and love for my fellow man? Are they going to see that in me? Because they’re not going to see that out there. What are they going to see? And furthermore, am I around enough, around them enough for them to see it?

It’s easy. It is easy. And I’m speaking from experience here. It is easy to be tied up in one’s work. I love my work. I love being able to visit with saints and to spend some time. I love being able to study God’s Word with various people. I love being able to get into the Word of God and to be able to spend so much time studying. I could spend 12, 14, 15 hours a day, even right here, doing good things, saying the Word of God. But guess what? If Jared and Ethan don’t see me and see me living that, I’ve lost them. And I failed God. The world is so much about getting ahead and parents being out in the workplace and doing more and more and being involved in more and more activities.

If your kids aren’t around you, then they’re going to be around somebody. Some of you are familiar with the actor Rob Lowe. To say that Rob Lowe has lived a moral life would uh, well, that wouldn’t be true. They wrote an autobiography recently, and Rob Lowe, like so many actors, having been involved in drugs and alcohol and so many things throughout his life. Wrote about how his parents were divorced. And how he would visit his dad and his dad would try to impart wisdom to them, but it just didn’t work. And here’s why, he says.

Eating together, doing homework, watching Little League, driving them around endlessly, being bored with nothing to do, letting them listen while you do business, while you negotiate love and the frustrations and complications and rewards of living daily in and out with your wife. Through this, they see how adults handle responsibility, honesty, commitment, jealousy, anger, professional pressures, and social interactions. Kids learn from whoever is around them the most. Now, that point was about divorces. We certainly couldn’t make that point, but we’re just talking about being around our kids in general. We’re the ones that they need to observe. Because they are observing something. If we want to give them over to the television, fine, they’re going to observe what’s on the television. You don’t want them acting that out.

5. They Need to Do

You want to put them in the school set? I’m not saying anything about schools. I know they’re wonderful teachers out in the schools. But if you want to say that’s what they’re going to observe, okay. But they’ve got to see it from you. And mine have to see it from me. If they don’t observe God’s way in my life, then they’re going to be observing the world’s way in the lives of others. And finally, they need to do. We’ve been focusing on the negative aspect. We’ve been focusing on the ways of the world. Well, we want to warn them against the ways of the world. We don’t want them to follow those paths, and there has to be something on the other side of that. We want to say, don’t go down this road, then we also have to say, here’s the road you must go down.

And so we’ve got to show them the principles of that. If being a follower of God is coming to understand his word and being able to teach others, then we need to start giving them some practice and coming to understand the word of God and being able to talk about the word of God. That might just be in a home Bible study. That might be in other situations as they grow older and they can talk to their friends, but we’ve got to give them practice in that. If being a follower of God is being a loving person and one who takes care of others, then we’ve got to give them some practice in that. It’s not enough just to say, yes, our family does this, and mom and dad have been doing this, but we’ve got to get them involved in sending the cards to the sick and going to visit the sick and being a good influence on others.

Conclusion

Because a part of training is doing. And being a young is an excuse to not being engaged and being active. Now, what we have to say the rest of the month will be more involved with these things that they ought to be doing, the way of the Lord. But I just submit for now. If we’re really concerned with not letting our children fall victim to the ways of the world, then this is how we train them. Teach them, let them observe, and help them to do. I hope that is meaningful to you, not just for parents, but just as a Christian. That you want to be taught by God and observe the lives of those who love him, even observing the lives of those in the scriptures, and that you want to do as well.

He is our Father, and He has given His Word to train us. We, though, like all rebellious, like all children, will rebel. We do sin against our Father. But because of His love for us, He gave His Son so that we could be forgiven, so that we could be with Him. Will you accept the offer of His Son this morning? Would you believe in God with your whole heart? Believe in Jesus as a Son. Repent of your wrongs, be baptized to have your sins forgiven. If there’s some way that we can aid you, won’t you come as we stand and as we sing?